So I'm going to cheat. I've been home (which is the USA for you tea party people) since the 20th of July but I'm going to pretend I'm still in VN so I can finish up this blog. Thus, I must ask you to suspend belief and imagine real hard I'm still back in Vietnam, forgetting the fact I have been stuffing my face with high fructose corn syrup and processed foods for the past week.
Done? Okay.
I finished up my stint in Saigon for about 6 days. Now, if you have heard me talk about my family in Saigon, it may seem like I hate them--and to an extent, I do in that they suffocate the hell out of me and as DJ Jazzy Jeff would say, they "just don't understand" or get me, mainly my sarcasm, and this results into them thinking I am the dumbest person in the world.
Example: I leave the house without permission to walk around. Now understand, this is after I have lived in Hanoi practically by myself for 10 months. They call me a couple of times and I just tell them I'm walking. I'm hungry and buy a sweet bun. I return home and my aunt looks surprised I can feed myself.
"How much did you buy that?!?!"
I reply, "300k [15 dollars]."
"OH MY GOD YOU GOT RIPPED OFF!!@!@!@"
I have a blank stare. "You know 300K is 15 dollars. Who would buy a bun for 15 dollars?"
"WHY DID YOU BUY THAT FOR SO MUCH!@!@??"
"I didn't really buy it for 300k..." Sigh. I spend 10 minutes trying to tell them I was joking...
Example 2: I go for another illegal walk. I return.
"Where were you?"
"Walking."
"Do you even know where you are going??!?@!"
"Nope. And by walking down the street, I was mugged, lost my cell phone, and had to eat a dead rat on the street to survive."
"WHAT?!@?! You got MUGGED#!@!!??"
"No..."
"OH MY GOD, and YOUR PHONE!@!??"
"No..." Another 20 minutes there.
Example 3: There is an ad in VN TV and movie theaters that show a white couple screaming at a spider. A white girl pops in and googles on her phone how to kill spiders. However, she does it in Viet.
I say, "Wow, her Vietnamese is really good. Even better than mine!"
My cousins looks at me. "No, they use computer animation to do that. You see, she really doesn't know Vietnamese..."
"I know...I was joking and trying to make a comment about race and advertising in VN....you know what, just FUCK IT and everybody get a sense of humor!!" (This was a boiling over point--And the f--k it part was in my head)
Another thing that bothered me was really a translation issue. Now I can almost eat anything. My limits include dogs, cats, and durian (sau rieng). Other than that, I am good to go. My family would try to feed me every 2 hours (see post about food/eating). As a normal person, I don't eat that much so I would politely decline if they offered food because as an adult, I have learned to understand signals my body gives me, such as "I'm not hungry right now." Yet, when I decline food, they say khong biet an, which translates to "I don't know how to eat that." As a person who ate a rat on the street to survive, I find that really condescending and it always pissed me off because I don't want to be labeled as the pansy "I like my lettuce e coli free" fancy-pants American who is afraid of oriental food. I can and have eaten almost every major dish of Vietnam.
The phrase "khong biet an," however, does mean something a bit different than its literal translation. I know this but it still angers me for the reason above. It usually means that a person doesn't prefer to eat a certain food, as in I don't favor this specific fruit. This complicates things as when they say that, they decide I'm still hungry, they just recommended the wrong dish and still push food towards my digestive system, not understanding that I don't eat because I'm NOT hungry. It also angered me that none of them recognized that nobody in the family wanted to eat every 2 hours, showing that NORMAL people don't eat this much. Yes, I get they are trying to be nice, but please leave me alone. [Slams door, listens to Nirvana with my lower lip out]
Yes, looking back, I was a bit of a cranky pants to my family, but I did cool off, at least I tried to, at the end of the week. And yes I do sound like a 15 year old teenager with a bad tude because my parents never did this to me during my teen years so here was my chance to be a rebellious teenage at age 24.
Still, I like my family. If you think about the situation, I guess I can understand their position: 1) They are responsible for me in a "foreign" country and have to answer to my parents 2) I'm kind of a big deal, 3) and here is the toughest one, I probably will not make it back to VN before some of them die.
So while I wished they would be more considerate of what I wanted--for example, just room to breathe--I do realize VN is not a yearly trip for me and I have only meet my family 3 times in my life. I don't like to think about this stuff, and I'm sure most don't, but it is something I need to recognize and accept. A week of being sheltered isn't so bad in the long run, considering these may be the last moments I spend with them. It was nice to share that time, even if it wasn't very pleasant for me, but you got to be less selfish when it comes to stuff like this.
To pump up my ego even more, I also recognize that from my dad's side, my two sisters and I are the future of US-VN relationships for the family because my dad is the only member here in the US. This might complicate things in the future in terms of money (see Daughter From DaNang--also an example of suffocating family life, though I'm not a big fan of her actions. Also, right now, money isn't a big deal as I am still a student, thus I am POOR. Please donate to my bank account.), but I do feel I should have some connection to them presently and in the future. And to be realistic, if I was getting older and towards the end of my life, I would want to spend as much time with Tony as possible.
So there are some memories of my family life in VN. Again, messy yet loving. So, you know, like every family in the world. I know I have become negative Nancy again, but good times include really good food (when I was hungry), fun conversations, and sad, yet meaningful goodbyes.
More quick memories:
The airport security stopping me in Saigon for my 300 pirate discs. "Well the American shows are okay, but we're going to have to take the Vietnamese films." That comment was surprising to me--last time, it was the American DVDs causing problems, not the VN films. After some haggling, I was let through. Don't tell the dude this, but I was on the verge of giving him 20 bucks, with the upward limit of 75 dollars. Informal Economies. It's for Research. Learning about piracy culture. Pick one of those excuses and don't judge me.
Seeing a European tourist cry because she was being honked at too much when crossing the street. This is why I believe when the nuclear Apocalypse comes, as foretold in the book of Sarah Connor, people from third world countries will do MUCH better than us wimpy first world peeps.
Another example. Seeing a small kid, maybe 5 or 6, pick up a leaf. I'm thinking, Oh that's cute. Him eating the leaf. Oh shit. Seeing stuff like this has made me much more humble and now I have this nasty habit of labeling things "first-world" problems and "real" problems. Don't get me wrong, I still complain a lot about stupid things, but I try to be more aware of real problems.
Example of "first-world" problems: Oh man, Netflix is now 15 dollars. I have to pay so much to stream movies through my xbox. Oh geez, life is hard.
Real problem: Shut the fuck up. I just ate a leaf from the street for lunch. Take your twitter problems and shove it up your ass. [This is why this is a nasty habit]
Post is getting a bit long. Save more for later.
tony
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Countdown to the end...
Please play this song when reading this post. Unless you live in the USA then play the second song. Yes, I take blogging to the next dimension.
So I've been accused for painting a negative picture of my "homeland," but only from one person and her opinion doesn't really matter anyways. Looking back, I would say yes, the term Hanoian Assholery could be taken as a less than positive term and there are some posts about the more darker sides of the Vietnam. Still, I stand by my blog (unless later on I get called out, then I will deny, deny, deny) because I feel I defend VN a lot in many ways and (hopefully) don't illustrate VN in terms of black and white, but messy, conflicted, and complex grays, perhaps similar to the way I see and feel about VN as a person who straddles the line between local and foreigner. Plus, if I only did positive posts, wouldn't that make me a communist propaganda machine?
As much crap as I give Hanoi, I really enjoyed my time there (turn the music up if you are on track 1) and it was a pretty sad time to leave (I left two days ago). It was much harder than I imagined to "chia tay" (literally split hands but used as semi slang for breakups/leaving relationships) with people, though I blame all these people for giving me gifts that made me go over the airplane weight limit by 50 kgs. (However, I was only charged for 30 because either I was cute or the woman behind the counter was really bad at math. Considering she's Asian, the only logical conclusion was that I was so cute, she saved me 40 dollars.)
So special shout out to my research peoples, who considering the nature of my research, were surprisingly really open about their work and literally took me in as family. Another to people who helped me out with my Viet, get settled in with research connections even before I got here, and took me out to see the city of Hanoi. And last in my monkey sphere (not really an academic source but good enough for this blog) are the people who introduced me to the concept of the monkey sphere slash jump until you want to vomit and pass out club (a special post will be dedicated to y'all later). And thanks for the shirt, as I have a pair of cutoff jeans that would totally rock that look.
Ummm, so in dedication to the special city of Hanoi, I will try to list some of my most memorable experiences there, good and bad. While filled with Hanoi Assholery, there is much charm and a different kind of friendliness that accompanies the assholes. I would definitely visit it again and if things work out, perhaps live there for an extended amount of time again.
One of the first memories I have of Hanoi is the bus system. Standing one day by a bus stop, a bus pulls up and does the normal "I can't fully stop or the bus will explode!!" routine and seeing a pregnant woman, I'm guessing 6 to 8 months, waddle-run while using her hands to hold up her stomach as the bus was creeping away at a fairly fast pace. Yeah, this isn't Kansas anymore--unless the pregnant woman was black, then that probably happens all the time in Kansas.
Another bus story involves the great navigation of VIP in a bus in Thanh Hoa. Visiting her family in the countryside, we were on local bus that goes near her family's house. She asks the bus worker we needed to get to this stop and it seemed like everything was set. Until about 20 minutes (longer?) later, she asked when the stop was coming. Hah, the look on that guy's face. It kind of said "Shit, I forgot you guys were there!" It turns out we missed our stop by a bunch of kilometers and the WHOLE bus was laughing at us city-folk (or at least they were in my head). We got off and we had the option of walking to the next bus stop to retrace our route or call her family. However, at least the weather was nice and cool and the views of mountains and the green farms pretty relaxing. This was perhaps due to being in the city too long but it was eerily quiet and if we were minorities (which we kind of were), we would have been murdered Texas Chainsaw style. Fun trip, considering VIP was very consistent in her ability to get us in the wrong direction (we had another bus incident in the morning).
Another "first" memory was my first time going to the market to buy veggies. After selecting about 3 kilos of food, I asked how much and the lady said 16,000 dong (80 cents). Now I really thought my Vietnamese was crap because there was no way that was correct and was somewhat bummed because I thought I at least mastered numbers. Turns out, I did know my numbers and that was the correct figure. Gosh darn that's cheap.
And that's with me not even trying to bargain. One time, I was trying to buy toys for Christmas and I only had 300K. So in my mind, I was like "Let's do this, under 300k!!" So I picked out like 5 toys and I asked a very generic how much, expecting some relatively high price for VN, around 500K and I was planning to HALF that as my goal to get under 300k. How much? 220,000. Oh.....I'll take it. Damn.
Two more quick points. I have learned that here in VN, you should NEVER go to the movies by yourself. I needed to see Rio, the Vietnamese VO version to compare it to another translation of the film. I managed to catch it on the last day it was playing, which was like a Tuesday and there were only 2 times: 9 am and 11 am. Fair to say, it was a random movie at a random time and I felt like some fun "Tony" time. So I went to Megastar and brought a ticket. The girl behind the counter asked, "Just one?" and gave me a puzzled face. I said "Yup." She laughed at me. I then went to the person that collects tickets. "Just you?" "Yup." She laughed at me. When I left the room, the people who clean up the popcorn laughed at me. I told a friend about this and she said, "You went alone...?" And then she laughed at me. "WHY?"
Apparently, you are suppose to go to movies with other people so afterward, you can chat about it. It's like a tradition or something. So I tried it with my cousins and they picked the wonderful Transformers 3, though you have to give the Bay credit, he certainly can film an action scene. My impressions of the film: I found it amazing that Rosie Huntington-Whitely survived the last hour of the film (which was one huge battle scene) in heels. She ran across Chicago while it was being devoured in heels. Anyways, this movie led to the funniest/weirdest quote I've heard in VN a la my cousin: "It had too much talking!"
tony
So I've been accused for painting a negative picture of my "homeland," but only from one person and her opinion doesn't really matter anyways. Looking back, I would say yes, the term Hanoian Assholery could be taken as a less than positive term and there are some posts about the more darker sides of the Vietnam. Still, I stand by my blog (unless later on I get called out, then I will deny, deny, deny) because I feel I defend VN a lot in many ways and (hopefully) don't illustrate VN in terms of black and white, but messy, conflicted, and complex grays, perhaps similar to the way I see and feel about VN as a person who straddles the line between local and foreigner. Plus, if I only did positive posts, wouldn't that make me a communist propaganda machine?
As much crap as I give Hanoi, I really enjoyed my time there (turn the music up if you are on track 1) and it was a pretty sad time to leave (I left two days ago). It was much harder than I imagined to "chia tay" (literally split hands but used as semi slang for breakups/leaving relationships) with people, though I blame all these people for giving me gifts that made me go over the airplane weight limit by 50 kgs. (However, I was only charged for 30 because either I was cute or the woman behind the counter was really bad at math. Considering she's Asian, the only logical conclusion was that I was so cute, she saved me 40 dollars.)
So special shout out to my research peoples, who considering the nature of my research, were surprisingly really open about their work and literally took me in as family. Another to people who helped me out with my Viet, get settled in with research connections even before I got here, and took me out to see the city of Hanoi. And last in my monkey sphere (not really an academic source but good enough for this blog) are the people who introduced me to the concept of the monkey sphere slash jump until you want to vomit and pass out club (a special post will be dedicated to y'all later). And thanks for the shirt, as I have a pair of cutoff jeans that would totally rock that look.
Ummm, so in dedication to the special city of Hanoi, I will try to list some of my most memorable experiences there, good and bad. While filled with Hanoi Assholery, there is much charm and a different kind of friendliness that accompanies the assholes. I would definitely visit it again and if things work out, perhaps live there for an extended amount of time again.
One of the first memories I have of Hanoi is the bus system. Standing one day by a bus stop, a bus pulls up and does the normal "I can't fully stop or the bus will explode!!" routine and seeing a pregnant woman, I'm guessing 6 to 8 months, waddle-run while using her hands to hold up her stomach as the bus was creeping away at a fairly fast pace. Yeah, this isn't Kansas anymore--unless the pregnant woman was black, then that probably happens all the time in Kansas.
Another bus story involves the great navigation of VIP in a bus in Thanh Hoa. Visiting her family in the countryside, we were on local bus that goes near her family's house. She asks the bus worker we needed to get to this stop and it seemed like everything was set. Until about 20 minutes (longer?) later, she asked when the stop was coming. Hah, the look on that guy's face. It kind of said "Shit, I forgot you guys were there!" It turns out we missed our stop by a bunch of kilometers and the WHOLE bus was laughing at us city-folk (or at least they were in my head). We got off and we had the option of walking to the next bus stop to retrace our route or call her family. However, at least the weather was nice and cool and the views of mountains and the green farms pretty relaxing. This was perhaps due to being in the city too long but it was eerily quiet and if we were minorities (which we kind of were), we would have been murdered Texas Chainsaw style. Fun trip, considering VIP was very consistent in her ability to get us in the wrong direction (we had another bus incident in the morning).
Another "first" memory was my first time going to the market to buy veggies. After selecting about 3 kilos of food, I asked how much and the lady said 16,000 dong (80 cents). Now I really thought my Vietnamese was crap because there was no way that was correct and was somewhat bummed because I thought I at least mastered numbers. Turns out, I did know my numbers and that was the correct figure. Gosh darn that's cheap.
And that's with me not even trying to bargain. One time, I was trying to buy toys for Christmas and I only had 300K. So in my mind, I was like "Let's do this, under 300k!!" So I picked out like 5 toys and I asked a very generic how much, expecting some relatively high price for VN, around 500K and I was planning to HALF that as my goal to get under 300k. How much? 220,000. Oh.....I'll take it. Damn.
Two more quick points. I have learned that here in VN, you should NEVER go to the movies by yourself. I needed to see Rio, the Vietnamese VO version to compare it to another translation of the film. I managed to catch it on the last day it was playing, which was like a Tuesday and there were only 2 times: 9 am and 11 am. Fair to say, it was a random movie at a random time and I felt like some fun "Tony" time. So I went to Megastar and brought a ticket. The girl behind the counter asked, "Just one?" and gave me a puzzled face. I said "Yup." She laughed at me. I then went to the person that collects tickets. "Just you?" "Yup." She laughed at me. When I left the room, the people who clean up the popcorn laughed at me. I told a friend about this and she said, "You went alone...?" And then she laughed at me. "WHY?"
Apparently, you are suppose to go to movies with other people so afterward, you can chat about it. It's like a tradition or something. So I tried it with my cousins and they picked the wonderful Transformers 3, though you have to give the Bay credit, he certainly can film an action scene. My impressions of the film: I found it amazing that Rosie Huntington-Whitely survived the last hour of the film (which was one huge battle scene) in heels. She ran across Chicago while it was being devoured in heels. Anyways, this movie led to the funniest/weirdest quote I've heard in VN a la my cousin: "It had too much talking!"
tony
Friday, July 8, 2011
My Potential Mistresses
Awhile back, I was asked by my uncle if I had a girlfriend in Hanoi. Of course, I said no (wink, wink EAG) and he replied, "Tại sao, cháu sợ?" which translates to "why, are you scared?" This comment, however, was translated in my head as "Why not pussy, you scured...bitch?" And to that, I responded, "Psh, I'm playin' fool, I gots so many hoes, I don't even know what to do"--this was in Vietnamese, of course. [Editor's note: Yeah, surprisingly, the last comment did not happen. I know, shocking. What really happened was a weak "noooo..." was stuttered and a sad walk out the room, a la Arrested Development.]
Apparently, this is a very popular question and has been posed to me by my Xe om/motorbike taxi, who recommended I go to the countryside because it is "easier" to get women there (ya'll know how them country girls are) or the Philippines (yeah, don't ask because I don't know either), my other uncles, some male students, some female students (one which will be further discussed below), my landlord, and my neighbors. Now, I think some were just joking, but some others were a bit harder to discern their true feelings over the subject of having multiple "lovers." And honestly, I really believe that some of them endorse the notion that, in my case, it is okay to have a Vietnamese wife in VN and another wife (race is flexible here but Viet is preferred) in America. It is just the natural desire and virility of the Vietnamese MAN, so sorry EAG, it's in the genes. And in her jeans, and her jeans....[Ah, see what I did there. Poet, I be.]
With that inspiration for this post, I will list some potential mistresses here in VN, in no particular order because ranking them would be a bit sexist and degrading, which does not happen ever in this post. No pics because that's becoming a stalker.
The Nursing Student in Saigon
I met her in a cafe in Saigon around the time of Tet, the Vietnamese New Year. Normally a nursing student, but since everyone was off for holiday, she was helping out at her distant relative's cafe.
Pros: She is very hiền (meek, gentle), which is a nice change of pace from EAG, who has learned this nasty habit of showing "independent thought," which ladies, is kind of a turn off, FYI (I think I used this joke before...sorry). When I asked her what she does for fun in Saigon, she said, "Oh, I like studying, checking blood, running tests, helping people who are sick, etc." And the crazy thing is that there was no ounce of any sarcasm or joking, and she said it in such a soft voice, it was ridiculously innocent and pure. And a person in the medical field that cares about patients? Psh, that's why VN is still a developing nation.
Cons: I don't like to give blood for tests so I would imagine Friday nights of her taking my blood pressure and drawing blood from me a bit scary and boring.
The Film Student
I probably shouldn't write about students, but I'm going to because this is pretty funny. Met her at one of my schools I work at in Hanoi.
Pros: Very friendly and pretty. Straight to the point in many subjects.
Cons: Maybe too friendly. Said I'm too young to be in a long term relationship and that I should break it up now because it would be easier now than later. Asked me what chance she has with me, in front of the entire class (maybe this is a pro--initiative? She got ovaries of steel, as I could never do that.). The other male students in the class told me to be careful and that she is called "Da Spider" and let my imagination determine what that nickname means.
The Highly Priced Makeup Salesperson
I walk by this store to go do research and occasionally make eye contact with her.
Pros: Very Pretty. Has a job. Knows how to do makeup.
Cons: She is what some Viet people would call điệu, or "high maintenance," and that sometimes comes with an attitude undesirable to me (but maybe good for a mistress...). Stealing an artistic concept from John, I think with the amount of makeup she wears, if she ever does leave the air conditioned store, she would literally melt her face off. And we all have seen "beautiful" celebrities with their makeup off, so who knows what lies beneath. Yeah, I'm vain.
The Tour Guide in Dong Hoi
Umm, she was the tour guide we had in Dong Hoi. Met her on the tour.
Pros: I think most people on the tour (Fulbright Peeps) totally knew I was severely crushing on this lady. Cute. Cute. Cute. Cute shoes too. Can't really explain it, she was just adorable like a puppy rolling in spring grass. I'm sorry EAG but I think I love her in the way only 1990s R&B Boy Band sensation can describe:
*But don't worry EAG, I still love more, via the better 1990s R&B Boy Band Sensation Boyz II Men:*
Cons: Works in the tourism industry, though this would be good for me if I ever did marry her because of my English skills, I'm sure I would be a popular guide for English speaking tourists. Plus I can say, "I don't care what Lonely Planet says, I'm Vietnamese, are you telling me I'm wrong?? Anyways, as I was saying, after Ho Chi Minh defeated Hitler and killed 32,195 Nazis in 1975..." (It's okay, I'm a product of Texas Public Education). Yup, she's close to perfection
And no EAG, this is not a warning. Just step your game up is all I'm saying.
tony
Apparently, this is a very popular question and has been posed to me by my Xe om/motorbike taxi, who recommended I go to the countryside because it is "easier" to get women there (ya'll know how them country girls are) or the Philippines (yeah, don't ask because I don't know either), my other uncles, some male students, some female students (one which will be further discussed below), my landlord, and my neighbors. Now, I think some were just joking, but some others were a bit harder to discern their true feelings over the subject of having multiple "lovers." And honestly, I really believe that some of them endorse the notion that, in my case, it is okay to have a Vietnamese wife in VN and another wife (race is flexible here but Viet is preferred) in America. It is just the natural desire and virility of the Vietnamese MAN, so sorry EAG, it's in the genes. And in her jeans, and her jeans....[Ah, see what I did there. Poet, I be.]
With that inspiration for this post, I will list some potential mistresses here in VN, in no particular order because ranking them would be a bit sexist and degrading, which does not happen ever in this post. No pics because that's becoming a stalker.
The Nursing Student in Saigon
I met her in a cafe in Saigon around the time of Tet, the Vietnamese New Year. Normally a nursing student, but since everyone was off for holiday, she was helping out at her distant relative's cafe.
Pros: She is very hiền (meek, gentle), which is a nice change of pace from EAG, who has learned this nasty habit of showing "independent thought," which ladies, is kind of a turn off, FYI (I think I used this joke before...sorry). When I asked her what she does for fun in Saigon, she said, "Oh, I like studying, checking blood, running tests, helping people who are sick, etc." And the crazy thing is that there was no ounce of any sarcasm or joking, and she said it in such a soft voice, it was ridiculously innocent and pure. And a person in the medical field that cares about patients? Psh, that's why VN is still a developing nation.
Cons: I don't like to give blood for tests so I would imagine Friday nights of her taking my blood pressure and drawing blood from me a bit scary and boring.
The Film Student
I probably shouldn't write about students, but I'm going to because this is pretty funny. Met her at one of my schools I work at in Hanoi.
Pros: Very friendly and pretty. Straight to the point in many subjects.
Cons: Maybe too friendly. Said I'm too young to be in a long term relationship and that I should break it up now because it would be easier now than later. Asked me what chance she has with me, in front of the entire class (maybe this is a pro--initiative? She got ovaries of steel, as I could never do that.). The other male students in the class told me to be careful and that she is called "Da Spider" and let my imagination determine what that nickname means.
The Highly Priced Makeup Salesperson
I walk by this store to go do research and occasionally make eye contact with her.
Pros: Very Pretty. Has a job. Knows how to do makeup.
Cons: She is what some Viet people would call điệu, or "high maintenance," and that sometimes comes with an attitude undesirable to me (but maybe good for a mistress...). Stealing an artistic concept from John, I think with the amount of makeup she wears, if she ever does leave the air conditioned store, she would literally melt her face off. And we all have seen "beautiful" celebrities with their makeup off, so who knows what lies beneath. Yeah, I'm vain.
The Tour Guide in Dong Hoi
Umm, she was the tour guide we had in Dong Hoi. Met her on the tour.
Pros: I think most people on the tour (Fulbright Peeps) totally knew I was severely crushing on this lady. Cute. Cute. Cute. Cute shoes too. Can't really explain it, she was just adorable like a puppy rolling in spring grass. I'm sorry EAG but I think I love her in the way only 1990s R&B Boy Band sensation can describe:
*But don't worry EAG, I still love more, via the better 1990s R&B Boy Band Sensation Boyz II Men:*
Cons: Works in the tourism industry, though this would be good for me if I ever did marry her because of my English skills, I'm sure I would be a popular guide for English speaking tourists. Plus I can say, "I don't care what Lonely Planet says, I'm Vietnamese, are you telling me I'm wrong?? Anyways, as I was saying, after Ho Chi Minh defeated Hitler and killed 32,195 Nazis in 1975..." (It's okay, I'm a product of Texas Public Education). Yup, she's close to perfection
And no EAG, this is not a warning. Just step your game up is all I'm saying.
tony
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Reverse Culture Shock and Reflections on my journey *eye rolls*
So, long time no see. Well, my time in VN is coming to a close as I leave in late July, so after that, I'll probably put the blog down because I will no longer be worthy of having a blog. It's not like anyone can just blog--that's a bit vain don't you think?
This blog with be a hodge-podge of recent events. Maybe I'll do it in the future but there were some blog posts I planned in my head but never felt like actually writing them. They include a tourist itinerary for a home stay with me, a graduate student (yes I hate tourism industry here), so you can experience the traditional life of a minority student in the US and a Xe Om (motorbike taxi) Driver love advice column, based on real advice my xe om driver has given me over the last 10 months.
Okay, let's map this out, mainly for me. 1) My quick trip back home to Texas for my sister's wedding (click for pics) and 2) Some reflections on my stay here in VN.
In May, I flew home to Texas for a nice and hearty 5 nights. Let me tell you, try to never fly that much in so little time. 23 hours to DFW and then 22 hours back. From Tokyo to Hanoi coming back, I was literally freaking out and going insane from a combination of boredom, jet lag, and lack of sleep. Yeah, would not recommend. Being home was nice, if a bit surreal at times. Even a simple trip to good ol' Walmart was an assault on my eyes. I think we have a few of these supermarts in Hanoi but I have never been to one, sticking with the smaller markets, but it is just insane how much crap Walmart has in one building. I just can't explain how it feels to see all of these things laid out in a harshly lit warehouse. Basic things like driving and going to the mailbox were so eerily quiet. You just don't know how goddamn loud Hanoi is until you walk outside in Texas. It was peaceful but I think parts of me was wondering when the cars were going to hit me.
Apparently, according to EAG, I now drive much more aggressively. Usually, that wouldn't take much change as my mom says I drive like a old lady, but EAG felt her life was in danger. At first I thought she was joking but it turns out she was not. Hmm, Hanoi has rubbed off on me a bit.
The Hanoian Assholery, it seems, has also seem to have an affect on me. The wedding was in a small town, Marble Falls, Texas, and due to a "small" mix up, I was in the local Walmart. (*Side Story: So my mommy was in charge of my groomsmen suit and bringing it to the site, since I would be just flying in 3 days before the wedding. Anyways, the suit was misplaced and I didn't bring anything else to wear, so after a brief brouhaha, the only option was to, well, go to the local Walmart for a suit. Turns out, the suit was there all along and was in someone else's room. Hah Hah)
So while there, I got stared at a bit, and by a bit, I mean people would gaze at me for several seconds and follow my movements. Being in a country where you are the majority, even if there are days where I stand out (though many days I do pass as Viet), for 9 months and coming back to small Texas towns is pretty jarring, as I am now clearly an "Other." I think I straddle the line of normal and other here in VN, but it is pretty clear-cut in Marble Falls, Texas. Also, I think pent up anger of foreigners staring and taking pictures of me here adds to this particular situation. There was one cowboy who I thought was a bit over doing the "let's stare at the Asian guy" that I said out loud if he "had a problem, cowboy?" Now, EAG was with me and bit mad at my loudness and attempt to "start sh*t," which I responded, "Am I the first Oriental he has ever seen?" to which she replied, "Probably, yeah." I think the older version would be less angry and aggressive in tone--I would have probably said something but in a lighter, joking tone--but it seems the hard streets of Hanoi have made me rough and abrasive...so hard that I'll blog about it! I also think I less patient and more likely to get mad at things. Oh Hanoi.
*Another quick story--I was in the hotel near the wedding site and was getting my free waffle breakfast and at that time, I was then only Asian person there and getting stares from a bunch of old white people. Then Mrs. Moosa, a friend of my mom who was helping out the wedding, says in her really loud voice, "it's Tony! He just came from Vietnam!" Yes, that was true, but now it seems I just arrived here by boat. I speak English I swear!!*
As for emotional reflections, the way my parents raised me has basically limited my ability to reflect emotionally as we don't do that "white people" stuff. I don't know what to say. I've never been one to say that this is my motherland and I don't really have deep issues with who I am or where I belong. VN has been great so far and has really changed my life, but the weird thing is, I'm not exactly sure what those changes are yet. No offensive but I've seen other FB talk about how they exhibit growth in this and that (ability to learn, think, understand that there are different cultures (damn, it took a Fulbright Grant and thousands of taxpayer money to learn that!)), but it all sounds like fluff and stuff you say at job interviews. I guess I have to think more about this part, though I may just keep it to myself, because it's my personal growth, not yours. Get your own.
I'm really mean now.
tony
This blog with be a hodge-podge of recent events. Maybe I'll do it in the future but there were some blog posts I planned in my head but never felt like actually writing them. They include a tourist itinerary for a home stay with me, a graduate student (yes I hate tourism industry here), so you can experience the traditional life of a minority student in the US and a Xe Om (motorbike taxi) Driver love advice column, based on real advice my xe om driver has given me over the last 10 months.
Okay, let's map this out, mainly for me. 1) My quick trip back home to Texas for my sister's wedding (click for pics) and 2) Some reflections on my stay here in VN.
In May, I flew home to Texas for a nice and hearty 5 nights. Let me tell you, try to never fly that much in so little time. 23 hours to DFW and then 22 hours back. From Tokyo to Hanoi coming back, I was literally freaking out and going insane from a combination of boredom, jet lag, and lack of sleep. Yeah, would not recommend. Being home was nice, if a bit surreal at times. Even a simple trip to good ol' Walmart was an assault on my eyes. I think we have a few of these supermarts in Hanoi but I have never been to one, sticking with the smaller markets, but it is just insane how much crap Walmart has in one building. I just can't explain how it feels to see all of these things laid out in a harshly lit warehouse. Basic things like driving and going to the mailbox were so eerily quiet. You just don't know how goddamn loud Hanoi is until you walk outside in Texas. It was peaceful but I think parts of me was wondering when the cars were going to hit me.
Apparently, according to EAG, I now drive much more aggressively. Usually, that wouldn't take much change as my mom says I drive like a old lady, but EAG felt her life was in danger. At first I thought she was joking but it turns out she was not. Hmm, Hanoi has rubbed off on me a bit.
The Hanoian Assholery, it seems, has also seem to have an affect on me. The wedding was in a small town, Marble Falls, Texas, and due to a "small" mix up, I was in the local Walmart. (*Side Story: So my mommy was in charge of my groomsmen suit and bringing it to the site, since I would be just flying in 3 days before the wedding. Anyways, the suit was misplaced and I didn't bring anything else to wear, so after a brief brouhaha, the only option was to, well, go to the local Walmart for a suit. Turns out, the suit was there all along and was in someone else's room. Hah Hah)
So while there, I got stared at a bit, and by a bit, I mean people would gaze at me for several seconds and follow my movements. Being in a country where you are the majority, even if there are days where I stand out (though many days I do pass as Viet), for 9 months and coming back to small Texas towns is pretty jarring, as I am now clearly an "Other." I think I straddle the line of normal and other here in VN, but it is pretty clear-cut in Marble Falls, Texas. Also, I think pent up anger of foreigners staring and taking pictures of me here adds to this particular situation. There was one cowboy who I thought was a bit over doing the "let's stare at the Asian guy" that I said out loud if he "had a problem, cowboy?" Now, EAG was with me and bit mad at my loudness and attempt to "start sh*t," which I responded, "Am I the first Oriental he has ever seen?" to which she replied, "Probably, yeah." I think the older version would be less angry and aggressive in tone--I would have probably said something but in a lighter, joking tone--but it seems the hard streets of Hanoi have made me rough and abrasive...so hard that I'll blog about it! I also think I less patient and more likely to get mad at things. Oh Hanoi.
*Another quick story--I was in the hotel near the wedding site and was getting my free waffle breakfast and at that time, I was then only Asian person there and getting stares from a bunch of old white people. Then Mrs. Moosa, a friend of my mom who was helping out the wedding, says in her really loud voice, "it's Tony! He just came from Vietnam!" Yes, that was true, but now it seems I just arrived here by boat. I speak English I swear!!*
As for emotional reflections, the way my parents raised me has basically limited my ability to reflect emotionally as we don't do that "white people" stuff. I don't know what to say. I've never been one to say that this is my motherland and I don't really have deep issues with who I am or where I belong. VN has been great so far and has really changed my life, but the weird thing is, I'm not exactly sure what those changes are yet. No offensive but I've seen other FB talk about how they exhibit growth in this and that (ability to learn, think, understand that there are different cultures (damn, it took a Fulbright Grant and thousands of taxpayer money to learn that!)), but it all sounds like fluff and stuff you say at job interviews. I guess I have to think more about this part, though I may just keep it to myself, because it's my personal growth, not yours. Get your own.
I'm really mean now.
tony
Friday, April 15, 2011
The BEST way to ruin a mood in VN
So I was in a pretty good mood--we (VIP and I) had just had sushi and were on our way for a possible dessert course (Sorry EAG, it was totally a date). While we were walking, we arrived in front of Highway 4 on Xuan Dieu road, which wasn't our dessert destination but came upon an event that changed my mood. A drunk man was chasing and beating his wife (presumably) in the street with about 4 or 5 male onlookers.
I saw him throw her into the street and pull her hair, while attempting to kick her in the head (he barely missed). He was then somewhat restrained by the onlookers, but the woman continued to berate him, saying things like "he always seems to have time to go out to drink and that he goes out too often." After a few comments, he ran around the onlookers holding him and continued to chase her, attempting to slap her (some landed) and pull her hair. When her hair was being pulled, she did scream, but after he was restrained, she continued to talk to him. And so, this was repeated several times.
Now, in theory, anytime a person is being beat, no matter what culture you are in, it is wrong. And, again, in theory, if you can help you probably should.
But I didn't really help or intervene that much. Here is what my brain said: 1) I actually raised this question during a Fulbright Orientation and this bad-ass, ex-military security dude said do NOT get involved in the situation. 2) I don't know the full extent and details of this situation, mainly, I don't know if the onlookers are siding with a particular person and if I do get involved, what they would do to me, and possibly VIP. 3) He's drunk and like everywhere in VN, there are rocks and sharp things that can easily be used as weapons and can escalate this situation. 4) Let's say I do manage to restrain him--now what? Calling the cops in VN is like rubbing raw chicken into a open wound--it's not going to do any good, will probably make things worst, and is just dumb as shit. Hey, I love a Vietnamese man in a ugly-ass uniform, but honestly, they are corrupt and don't do squat (Hah, of course I'm joking you silly censors!). So anyways, yeah he'll continue the beating until he stops. 5) This is a different culture--I can't just come in and impose my will and expect things will all be dandy. Familial relationships operate differently here. Sounds dumb but you really can't just apply western notions over here, even on seemingly clear cut issues of abuse. 6) The presence of the wife would not make things better. I'm not saying she deserved it, but she did nothing to remedy the situation, i.e. walk away! As long as she was here, the fighting would not stop and I would be there for a long time.
Okay, so I think all of those points are valid and reasonable and logically, I did the "right" thing. But my gut and heart say those are just excuses and I'm not better than any of the other guys who just basically stood around and watched. The only time I somewhat got involved was when she ran towards me and I held back the husband for a little bit. But then she continued to run and he continued to chase. And I held him a bit more, along with the other guys. I think as we left, the other guys were trying to calm him down, or at least get him out of the area.
I feel guilty because I think I could have done more--as anyone who knows me, I really like to flex my hyper-masculine muscles through various means, mainly by dominating other humans and animals all the time, but considering he was drunk and from what I experienced holding him, I felt I could have "taken him." I'm not sure where I would have "taken" him, and, again, after that I wouldn't know what to do. Still, apparently a woman dies of domestic abuse every 3 days in VN.
And so I sit and think about her.
tony
Note: highway 4 had nothing to do with this...just felt like advertising. Never eaten there.
I saw him throw her into the street and pull her hair, while attempting to kick her in the head (he barely missed). He was then somewhat restrained by the onlookers, but the woman continued to berate him, saying things like "he always seems to have time to go out to drink and that he goes out too often." After a few comments, he ran around the onlookers holding him and continued to chase her, attempting to slap her (some landed) and pull her hair. When her hair was being pulled, she did scream, but after he was restrained, she continued to talk to him. And so, this was repeated several times.
Now, in theory, anytime a person is being beat, no matter what culture you are in, it is wrong. And, again, in theory, if you can help you probably should.
But I didn't really help or intervene that much. Here is what my brain said: 1) I actually raised this question during a Fulbright Orientation and this bad-ass, ex-military security dude said do NOT get involved in the situation. 2) I don't know the full extent and details of this situation, mainly, I don't know if the onlookers are siding with a particular person and if I do get involved, what they would do to me, and possibly VIP. 3) He's drunk and like everywhere in VN, there are rocks and sharp things that can easily be used as weapons and can escalate this situation. 4) Let's say I do manage to restrain him--now what? Calling the cops in VN is like rubbing raw chicken into a open wound--it's not going to do any good, will probably make things worst, and is just dumb as shit. Hey, I love a Vietnamese man in a ugly-ass uniform, but honestly, they are corrupt and don't do squat (Hah, of course I'm joking you silly censors!). So anyways, yeah he'll continue the beating until he stops. 5) This is a different culture--I can't just come in and impose my will and expect things will all be dandy. Familial relationships operate differently here. Sounds dumb but you really can't just apply western notions over here, even on seemingly clear cut issues of abuse. 6) The presence of the wife would not make things better. I'm not saying she deserved it, but she did nothing to remedy the situation, i.e. walk away! As long as she was here, the fighting would not stop and I would be there for a long time.
Okay, so I think all of those points are valid and reasonable and logically, I did the "right" thing. But my gut and heart say those are just excuses and I'm not better than any of the other guys who just basically stood around and watched. The only time I somewhat got involved was when she ran towards me and I held back the husband for a little bit. But then she continued to run and he continued to chase. And I held him a bit more, along with the other guys. I think as we left, the other guys were trying to calm him down, or at least get him out of the area.
I feel guilty because I think I could have done more--as anyone who knows me, I really like to flex my hyper-masculine muscles through various means, mainly by dominating other humans and animals all the time, but considering he was drunk and from what I experienced holding him, I felt I could have "taken him." I'm not sure where I would have "taken" him, and, again, after that I wouldn't know what to do. Still, apparently a woman dies of domestic abuse every 3 days in VN.
And so I sit and think about her.
tony
Note: highway 4 had nothing to do with this...just felt like advertising. Never eaten there.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
How to make Sapa Better
[Sigh, remember to read the note to the Right in the About me section. This post is a bit aggressive in tone and language. Read at your own risk. Word of the post: sarcasm.]
So I actually went to Sapa last November and been meaning to write this for awhile but just never got around to actually sitting down and typing this out. As you can see, Sapa, a mountainous region close to Vietnam's northern border inhabited by several groups of ethnic minorities and a large tourist attraction, is somewhat nice--if you like nature. However, after hearing a presentation about "eco-tourism," I was inspired to improve the tourism and overall experience of Sapa.
From what I can remember, the basic tenets of eco-tourism are 1) Protect the environment while conducting tourist activities and 2) Respect all inhabitants of the area of the tourist site. More specifically in the case of point 2, "respect" only means through monetary means--at least that was the only thing mentioned and stressed in this presentation. So in other words, pay more money to see stuff and as long as you dish out the dough, you can do whatever you want.
So here, in no order, are my suggestions on how to make Sapa and more tourist friendly place.
1) The Ethnic Minorities here should be more authentic!
Whats wrong with this picture?
Look, let's be honest--I don't really care about these people or their history and if anything, I'm only vaguely interested in how they live. But, when I take the time to visit these people and bless them with my money, I expect the "real" thing and by "real," I mean my uneducated imagination of non-western, oriental savages covered in filth and dirt that I have gathered through various forms of discourse and media. I don't care that culture is in constant motion, incorporating new aspects every second, or that certain "modern" things have become part of your daily lives (and thus becomes YOUR culture), I want the ancient traditions that I make up, which you probably don't even do anymore, with dirt and poverty so I can pretend I am being educated about your shit and pat myself on the back for being cultural back at my hotel.
So it bothers me to see any form of "Western" culture or any sign of upward mobility. Part of the charm is to see how much more advanced I am compared to your kind. I was also disturbed to see many tour guides, who are people from various ethnic minorities, be asked to take pictures and they did it without any problem--it is like they knew what a digital camera was. What would make this experience much better is if these guides would be like "Oh, what this shiny box that shoot light??" or "Oh this little nugget let you talk to spirit voices??" Of course, they should only do this for like a minute and then just take the damn picture but this would make me feel like I'm just discovering this tribe, right before I give them smallpox.
So while eco-tourism supports giving more money as a reward for being "real," I want the money earned to be spent as it would back in the good ol' traditional times--on sticks and mud or something like that to make a hut or something. Don't get a toilet or medicine for your kid (unless it's traditional medicine) and DON'T even think about sending your kids to school and moving. Who are my grandchildren going to take pictures of and feel superior too? Speaking of schools....
2) Make this school less boring.
For some God only knows reason, this school is built on a popular tourist trail and is actually part of the tour. It is a very new and clean school and clearly shows the Vietnamese Government cares these attractions "people" and their future and I think it balances out the various human-rights issues. But what is most important is Vietnam cares about what foreigners think about how the government helps those most in need, and to be blunt, foreigners are more important because we have money.
And the school is a great place for tourist. Never mind that a class was in session because we all know kids learn best when a bunch of white people take pictures of them. Research from MIT and Standford has proven that--Trust me, I ask.com it. And it is amazing that these savages can actually be taught something besides making crafts. Ignore the fact that many of these local tour guides can speak multiple languages (I heard Vietnamese, English, German, French, and their native languages) fluently, I found it wonderful and uplifting that the dregs and shit at the bottom of the barrel can work real hard while I take pictures of them. Cute kids. I almost donated 50 cents.
With that said, I found the school overall to be a bit boring. Considering most kids drop out to become tour guides or make cultural stuff for hipsters, I found that two rooms for classes to be excessive. Empty one out and put in a bar or club. And I think a Ferris wheel would really take it up a notch on the fun factor.
3) Could people lighten the fuck up?
Okay, I'll be honest again--I don't like people who take pictures of me. I am outside eating some food at a stall and some tourists come up and take a picture of the stall with me, a "real" local eating (Hah, the joke's on them!). Or one time I was at a temple attempting to pray (or something like that) and a tour group came in and took pics of me. Sometimes I have a "fuck you" moment and sometimes it is just whatever, I'll track YOU down one day at church and I'll take photos of you (Actually as a joke, I was thinking of taking Asian tourists to various places like Churches, trailer parks, suburban areas to take pictures but that's another post--OHHH, he's mowing the lawn! Just like in the 50's!). But that's different--I'm American.
So she's (in the pic above) probably thinking, "What is this a zoo?" and I would say YES, it is clearly a poverty zoo! And at zoos, the animals act cute and stuff. They LOVE it there! So why don't you just smile? You know I'm going to show this to my friends, right? Could you pretend you want to be in this picture? How about a funky pose? This is probably why you're poor because you are lazy.
So in conclusion, while sapa is a huge natural site of beauty, the human factor is kind of lacking. Step it up guys.
tony
So I actually went to Sapa last November and been meaning to write this for awhile but just never got around to actually sitting down and typing this out. As you can see, Sapa, a mountainous region close to Vietnam's northern border inhabited by several groups of ethnic minorities and a large tourist attraction, is somewhat nice--if you like nature. However, after hearing a presentation about "eco-tourism," I was inspired to improve the tourism and overall experience of Sapa.
From what I can remember, the basic tenets of eco-tourism are 1) Protect the environment while conducting tourist activities and 2) Respect all inhabitants of the area of the tourist site. More specifically in the case of point 2, "respect" only means through monetary means--at least that was the only thing mentioned and stressed in this presentation. So in other words, pay more money to see stuff and as long as you dish out the dough, you can do whatever you want.
So here, in no order, are my suggestions on how to make Sapa and more tourist friendly place.
1) The Ethnic Minorities here should be more authentic!
Whats wrong with this picture?
 |
| Exactly, those socks and color combination are clearly not traditional!! |
 |
| Umm could you hide that shit? |
So it bothers me to see any form of "Western" culture or any sign of upward mobility. Part of the charm is to see how much more advanced I am compared to your kind. I was also disturbed to see many tour guides, who are people from various ethnic minorities, be asked to take pictures and they did it without any problem--it is like they knew what a digital camera was. What would make this experience much better is if these guides would be like "Oh, what this shiny box that shoot light??" or "Oh this little nugget let you talk to spirit voices??" Of course, they should only do this for like a minute and then just take the damn picture but this would make me feel like I'm just discovering this tribe, right before I give them smallpox.
So while eco-tourism supports giving more money as a reward for being "real," I want the money earned to be spent as it would back in the good ol' traditional times--on sticks and mud or something like that to make a hut or something. Don't get a toilet or medicine for your kid (unless it's traditional medicine) and DON'T even think about sending your kids to school and moving. Who are my grandchildren going to take pictures of and feel superior too? Speaking of schools....
2) Make this school less boring.
For some God only knows reason, this school is built on a popular tourist trail and is actually part of the tour. It is a very new and clean school and clearly shows the Vietnamese Government cares these
And the school is a great place for tourist. Never mind that a class was in session because we all know kids learn best when a bunch of white people take pictures of them. Research from MIT and Standford has proven that--Trust me, I ask.com it. And it is amazing that these savages can actually be taught something besides making crafts. Ignore the fact that many of these local tour guides can speak multiple languages (I heard Vietnamese, English, German, French, and their native languages) fluently, I found it wonderful and uplifting that the dregs and shit at the bottom of the barrel can work real hard while I take pictures of them. Cute kids. I almost donated 50 cents.
With that said, I found the school overall to be a bit boring. Considering most kids drop out to become tour guides or make cultural stuff for hipsters, I found that two rooms for classes to be excessive. Empty one out and put in a bar or club. And I think a Ferris wheel would really take it up a notch on the fun factor.
3) Could people lighten the fuck up?
Okay, I'll be honest again--I don't like people who take pictures of me. I am outside eating some food at a stall and some tourists come up and take a picture of the stall with me, a "real" local eating (Hah, the joke's on them!). Or one time I was at a temple attempting to pray (or something like that) and a tour group came in and took pics of me. Sometimes I have a "fuck you" moment and sometimes it is just whatever, I'll track YOU down one day at church and I'll take photos of you (Actually as a joke, I was thinking of taking Asian tourists to various places like Churches, trailer parks, suburban areas to take pictures but that's another post--OHHH, he's mowing the lawn! Just like in the 50's!). But that's different--I'm American.
So she's (in the pic above) probably thinking, "What is this a zoo?" and I would say YES, it is clearly a poverty zoo! And at zoos, the animals act cute and stuff. They LOVE it there! So why don't you just smile? You know I'm going to show this to my friends, right? Could you pretend you want to be in this picture? How about a funky pose? This is probably why you're poor because you are lazy.
 |
| YAY! Culture! |
So in conclusion, while sapa is a huge natural site of beauty, the human factor is kind of lacking. Step it up guys.
tony
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Soccer/football
So apparently, soccer is very popular in the world, you know, except in the US. I believe the only time Americans get excited about soccer is during the world cup, which I think is kind of a "jump on the bandwagon" time created by marketing and hype of the event. Since being in Vietnam, I have watched more soccer games in the past 6 months than I have the previous 24 years in the US because my landlord and my neighbors are huge fans and occasionally invite me. (Little cute story: every time there is a game on, my landlord scarfs down dinner as fast as he can and keeps an eye on the clock so he doesn't miss a second of the game. He's like 60ish but he reminds me of 8 year-old catching his favorite TV show.) So now that I am a super-expert fan in the art of football, because we snobs know this is the real football, I have decided to support my teams by capitalist methods, mainly buying team clothing. So not only am I supporting my team, I can also become a walking billboard for their sponsors.
Naturally of course, I am very selective in choosing my favorite teams. The process goes like this: 1) Who has pretty colors in their Jerseys. That's it. Does this make me a woman?
So far I like Chelsea, Manchester United, and Liverpool because I think their jersey designs are neat. As far as the actually playing, it is okay and sometimes even exciting, though I have no idea about the standings or rosters. However, those concepts are for the brutes, as I am more specific in my entertainment and tend to appreciate the more shallow and materialistic side of football.
In my quest for clothes, I decided I should start with the "official" avenues of acquiring merchandise and visited the Nike and Adidas stores. While the selection is great, the prices are a bit out of my spending range, starting from about 30 dollars to 75 dollars--which is not too bad but that is way too much for a sport that honestly bores me 97 percent of the time. What confuses me is that most of these clothes are made in Vietnam so you would think shipping would be cheaper, thus resulting in a lower overall price. Also, considering I have never met anyone who works in a clothing factory to be rolling in cash, I would think the labor would bemore exploitative cheaper. Not a business person but I don't think that is how it works.
Anyways, I then visited a....let's call it an "unofficial factory-direct outlet store for damaged soccer merchandise" to see if I could get anything cheaper. Now these places are fun--part of the game is to find the defect and haggle your price down. This particular store would be an extra challenge since it was located in a heavily tourist area so you know the markup would be higher than usual. So I go in and look at pants and ask in Vietnamese what the prices are. One pair is 160k. I ask for two pants and get it down to 240k, or 120k each, roughly 6 dollars for a pair Chelsea and ManU pants with just some loose threads and ripped labels. Now considering these "real" versions are like 50 dollars in the US and the Official stores, I say that's a deal. But I was wondering if I could push harder and save 2 more dollars.
But then some tourists come and ask in English the prices of some shirts. 300k for a shirt. I ask the lady how much that shirt is for me and she said, "for you, 110k." I then decided I'm just going to quit while I'm ahead and brought the pants...though they did make fun of me because I brought two rival teams (Though the way I think of it, when both teams play each other, I always win). For you Americans, it is like buying a Cowboys shirt and a Eagles shirt at the same time. Yes, I think I will stick with the more complicated though less action version of football...
tony
 |
| Chelsea sure looks good on a Sony, I mean, Samsung TV |
Naturally of course, I am very selective in choosing my favorite teams. The process goes like this: 1) Who has pretty colors in their Jerseys. That's it. Does this make me a woman?
So far I like Chelsea, Manchester United, and Liverpool because I think their jersey designs are neat. As far as the actually playing, it is okay and sometimes even exciting, though I have no idea about the standings or rosters. However, those concepts are for the brutes, as I am more specific in my entertainment and tend to appreciate the more shallow and materialistic side of football.
In my quest for clothes, I decided I should start with the "official" avenues of acquiring merchandise and visited the Nike and Adidas stores. While the selection is great, the prices are a bit out of my spending range, starting from about 30 dollars to 75 dollars--which is not too bad but that is way too much for a sport that honestly bores me 97 percent of the time. What confuses me is that most of these clothes are made in Vietnam so you would think shipping would be cheaper, thus resulting in a lower overall price. Also, considering I have never met anyone who works in a clothing factory to be rolling in cash, I would think the labor would be
Anyways, I then visited a....let's call it an "unofficial factory-direct outlet store for damaged soccer merchandise" to see if I could get anything cheaper. Now these places are fun--part of the game is to find the defect and haggle your price down. This particular store would be an extra challenge since it was located in a heavily tourist area so you know the markup would be higher than usual. So I go in and look at pants and ask in Vietnamese what the prices are. One pair is 160k. I ask for two pants and get it down to 240k, or 120k each, roughly 6 dollars for a pair Chelsea and ManU pants with just some loose threads and ripped labels. Now considering these "real" versions are like 50 dollars in the US and the Official stores, I say that's a deal. But I was wondering if I could push harder and save 2 more dollars.
But then some tourists come and ask in English the prices of some shirts. 300k for a shirt. I ask the lady how much that shirt is for me and she said, "for you, 110k." I then decided I'm just going to quit while I'm ahead and brought the pants...though they did make fun of me because I brought two rival teams (Though the way I think of it, when both teams play each other, I always win). For you Americans, it is like buying a Cowboys shirt and a Eagles shirt at the same time. Yes, I think I will stick with the more complicated though less action version of football...
tony
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Buying fruit
Buying fruit here puts me in quite a dilemma: Should I try to save as much money as I can by haggling or should I just pay the extra money to a person who carries fruit on their shoulder for 13 hours a day? Although it may not sound that much, "unhaggled" fruit can cost up generally around a dollar more per kilo than market prices (maybe even more, though I will be honest and tell you I totally made that number up based on a few converstation between tourists and fruit sellers). If I buy 3 types of fruit once a week, in my ten months I will have lost about 120 dollars, which could have been invested in much more important things such as shoes or mirrors to celebrate my vanity and thoughtless consumer lifestyle. And remember, this is 120 dollars in VN, which can buy 960 loafs of french bread (banh mi). Though if I'm buying in bulk I could probably haggle the price down...Hell, I spent 130 dollars on ALL food one month when I only ate on the streets.
Still, that 120 dollars is probably towards the high end for me considering 1) I am "Vietnamese"ish and have a basic knowledge of the language--others might have to pay a "white/non-Viet" tax which might shoot that price way up and 2) I don't eat 3 kilos (6.6 pounds?) of fruit per week, though maybe I should. But, overall, I think I get fairly good deals with maybe a couple of 1000 tacked on here and there. Not to sound like a Richie Rich, but that amount (~5cents per 1000) is not worth haggling over and as I hinted in my first line, it's not like I'm dealing with Bank of America or AT&T CEOs who jack my cash, lose it, and give themselves raises and a new penthouse, these are people who roam the street from 6am to 11pm trying to sell fruit.
I really don't understand people who clearly have money (fancy suits) or foreigners who have enough dough to buy a plane ticket to Hanoi fighting over 20 or 30 cents (Oh, then they take a pic of the fruit seller with their 400 dollar camera. Oh my, poverty is so more exotic over here). Yes, you must be careful in VN or you will get ripped off but I think many translate that as you must squeeze every last penny from the price. Financially smart, yes, but if you do the math, fresh fruit is still much cheaper than the US (and probably less than wherever you came from). Example: From what I remember, I brought ginger in the states and for the size of my thumb, I paid about 20 cents? For 3000 dong (15 cents), I got a stick of ginger the size of my hand. Whoa, Whoa lady, how about 2500 dong?
Buying bananas is especially troubling--I have two banana people. One is a deaf-mute little person, whose sales benefit a deaf-mute school (or so the sign says), and the other is an older woman about 80 who can barely walk and spends all day sitting on a corner selling bananas. I been to both and I know I am being ripped off and by "ripped off" I mean 25 cents more than it should be--this ain't my first banana-buying rodeo. Still, if you do the math, I'm getting some darn good bananas for about 30 cents a pound, which is just a bit cheaper than Texas prices when I left in August (~47 cents/lb).
So here is how this converstation went down:
Banana Seller: For that bunch, 20,000 dong.
Me: Okay, Imma let you finish in a second. [I then interrupt her sign language by slapping her hands] Listen, you deaf-mute little person who sells crafts and fruit on the street to help fund a school that teaches blind, deaf, and mute people skills for living, I don't know who you think you are, but you are a despicable person. I, a person who has been blessed with all of my five senses and a decent monthly stipend that can very well afford this transaction, am appalled that you would take advantage of poor people like me and try to steal every dong I have worked for. You make me ill. How about 18,000?
BS: Okay.
Well, I have a secret. That didn't really happen. I fabricated that story so my blog would be more interesting. I brought the 1.3 kilos of bananas for a dollar and ate them. Probably because I have a soul and heart.
tony
Still, that 120 dollars is probably towards the high end for me considering 1) I am "Vietnamese"ish and have a basic knowledge of the language--others might have to pay a "white/non-Viet" tax which might shoot that price way up and 2) I don't eat 3 kilos (6.6 pounds?) of fruit per week, though maybe I should. But, overall, I think I get fairly good deals with maybe a couple of 1000 tacked on here and there. Not to sound like a Richie Rich, but that amount (~5cents per 1000) is not worth haggling over and as I hinted in my first line, it's not like I'm dealing with Bank of America or AT&T CEOs who jack my cash, lose it, and give themselves raises and a new penthouse, these are people who roam the street from 6am to 11pm trying to sell fruit.
I really don't understand people who clearly have money (fancy suits) or foreigners who have enough dough to buy a plane ticket to Hanoi fighting over 20 or 30 cents (Oh, then they take a pic of the fruit seller with their 400 dollar camera. Oh my, poverty is so more exotic over here). Yes, you must be careful in VN or you will get ripped off but I think many translate that as you must squeeze every last penny from the price. Financially smart, yes, but if you do the math, fresh fruit is still much cheaper than the US (and probably less than wherever you came from). Example: From what I remember, I brought ginger in the states and for the size of my thumb, I paid about 20 cents? For 3000 dong (15 cents), I got a stick of ginger the size of my hand. Whoa, Whoa lady, how about 2500 dong?
Buying bananas is especially troubling--I have two banana people. One is a deaf-mute little person, whose sales benefit a deaf-mute school (or so the sign says), and the other is an older woman about 80 who can barely walk and spends all day sitting on a corner selling bananas. I been to both and I know I am being ripped off and by "ripped off" I mean 25 cents more than it should be--this ain't my first banana-buying rodeo. Still, if you do the math, I'm getting some darn good bananas for about 30 cents a pound, which is just a bit cheaper than Texas prices when I left in August (~47 cents/lb).
So here is how this converstation went down:
Banana Seller: For that bunch, 20,000 dong.
Me: Okay, Imma let you finish in a second. [I then interrupt her sign language by slapping her hands] Listen, you deaf-mute little person who sells crafts and fruit on the street to help fund a school that teaches blind, deaf, and mute people skills for living, I don't know who you think you are, but you are a despicable person. I, a person who has been blessed with all of my five senses and a decent monthly stipend that can very well afford this transaction, am appalled that you would take advantage of poor people like me and try to steal every dong I have worked for. You make me ill. How about 18,000?
BS: Okay.
Well, I have a secret. That didn't really happen. I fabricated that story so my blog would be more interesting. I brought the 1.3 kilos of bananas for a dollar and ate them. Probably because I have a soul and heart.
tony
Monday, February 28, 2011
More Bad Things
Well, due to the great response of my last post, I will continue to be negative, but I will try to be much shorter...maybe.
Continuing on my feminist failures, I will have to deduct 50 feminist points from myself. A group of friends, who accidentally, EAG, was comprised of 7 girls, and I went to Kichi-Kichi, which is an all-you-can-eat rotary hotpot place where everyone gets their own mini hotpot, you pick raw stuff to put in the hot liquid, and cook it yourself. (see the link). So we were sitting at the bar getting our hotpot on and I had a person on both sides of me and got two conversations going. So when I talked togirl A Empowered Woman A, I had to turn the back of my head to Empowered Woman B. What I discovered that night is that Empowered Woman B liked to serve me food and put things in my hotpot when I wasn't looking.
I actually remember my response that night when I discovered what she was doing: "Damn, that is some wife material!" I know, kind of sexist. But as a person who generally serves himself, turning to your hotpot and seeing delicious and cooked things magically appear in your hotpot was very convenient and for some reason, tastes much better. I think it was the mystery of the unknown and the surprise that came at the end of my search--what dead item was being cooked in the incomprehensible depths (or about a 7 inches) of my hotpot? Frog Legs? Clams? Tofu? Shrimp? Yes to all!!
I told this story to EAG and told her cuz she was my wifey, I want surprises in my food. Then I thought it over and decided she would REALLY surprise me (i.e. "Is that wasabi in my ice cream?" Surprise!) so I took it back. The concept of women serving men food is bit complex here from my unofficial and unscientific study, which includes eating out and staring at people. The main difficulty is trying to figure out if women are just being nice (I think a lot of women who serve me are doing it because they are unsure I know how/what to eat) or if it is a result of some patriarchal ideology, or a combination of both. This is particularly difficult with younger people as there seems to be a more mixed showing. I do find, however, that many Asian female/Foreign Male couples do have the woman serving (and even feeding) men, which I don't think is bad but there is a patriarchal and post-colonial feel to it. Sigh, white men can never win =P and stop stealing OUR women!! says the guy with a non-azn wifey.
For the older generation, I think much of it is rooted with patriarchy. My landlord told me her husband is just incompetent so that is why she usually does the chores around the house, but I think that incompetence stems from him never having to do anything. A funny scene occurred a couple of weeks ago; It was just me and the husband in the house, as the landlord was out of town, and I came home around 11 pm to find this poor little man scourge around the kitchen looking for something to eat (he's normally asleep by 10). I think he made ramen noodles.
Food-wise, I'm okay but laundry I hate with a passion, especially here. The last two days were beautiful days--sunny and about 80ish degrees, something that hasn't appeared in Hanoi for weeks. So I decided I would do laundry tomorrow to take advantage of this sun and finally have some really dry clothes instead of the dampness that comes with cloudy cold days. Today was cloudy and dark. It's almost like living in Seattle...
My last story also involves laundry. Lunar New Years Day, I went to shower. Being American, I am weak towards cold water, which is what my family in Saigon has concluded. So when I shower, they heat up water for me in a pot and pour it in a bucket for my use. Okay, no problem, a nice hot "shower" (I use a water scoop) would be nice. Not wanting to be wasteful, I used all of the hot water, down to the last drop. I then grabbed my towel and wiped my face and hair and started to dry my arms. I then look down and see these tiny brown dots all over me--I'm not wearing my glasses and I am that blind. Turns out those dots are ants that decided my towel was play area. So then, naturally, comes the biting and the stings that result from that. My only option--rinse myself off. But, being a non-wasteful person, I used all of my hot water and now had to rinse myself off with cold water, which as anyone who has started in the hot tub and moved to the pool knows, felt much colder than it really was because I was warm from the hot water.
Ant bits on my neck, head, face, shoulders, arms and chest while I was shivering like a wet puppy. It seems I only get insect bites in large quantities over a large portion of my body (see HaLong Bay entry). Luckily, like AZN mosquitoes, these were tiny bites that didn't itch as much--I shudder to think if I was covered by Texas fire ants. Yeah, TEXAS AND AMERICAN ANTS ARE SUPERIOR!
USA
USA
USA
suck it communist ants.
tony
Oh and to ruin your day, the kitty in the pic on my sex post is dead. Got sick and died. This post is dedicated to you. RIP
Continuing on my feminist failures, I will have to deduct 50 feminist points from myself. A group of friends, who accidentally, EAG, was comprised of 7 girls, and I went to Kichi-Kichi, which is an all-you-can-eat rotary hotpot place where everyone gets their own mini hotpot, you pick raw stuff to put in the hot liquid, and cook it yourself. (see the link). So we were sitting at the bar getting our hotpot on and I had a person on both sides of me and got two conversations going. So when I talked to
I actually remember my response that night when I discovered what she was doing: "Damn, that is some wife material!" I know, kind of sexist. But as a person who generally serves himself, turning to your hotpot and seeing delicious and cooked things magically appear in your hotpot was very convenient and for some reason, tastes much better. I think it was the mystery of the unknown and the surprise that came at the end of my search--what dead item was being cooked in the incomprehensible depths (or about a 7 inches) of my hotpot? Frog Legs? Clams? Tofu? Shrimp? Yes to all!!
I told this story to EAG and told her cuz she was my wifey, I want surprises in my food. Then I thought it over and decided she would REALLY surprise me (i.e. "Is that wasabi in my ice cream?" Surprise!) so I took it back. The concept of women serving men food is bit complex here from my unofficial and unscientific study, which includes eating out and staring at people. The main difficulty is trying to figure out if women are just being nice (I think a lot of women who serve me are doing it because they are unsure I know how/what to eat) or if it is a result of some patriarchal ideology, or a combination of both. This is particularly difficult with younger people as there seems to be a more mixed showing. I do find, however, that many Asian female/Foreign Male couples do have the woman serving (and even feeding) men, which I don't think is bad but there is a patriarchal and post-colonial feel to it. Sigh, white men can never win =P and stop stealing OUR women!! says the guy with a non-azn wifey.
For the older generation, I think much of it is rooted with patriarchy. My landlord told me her husband is just incompetent so that is why she usually does the chores around the house, but I think that incompetence stems from him never having to do anything. A funny scene occurred a couple of weeks ago; It was just me and the husband in the house, as the landlord was out of town, and I came home around 11 pm to find this poor little man scourge around the kitchen looking for something to eat (he's normally asleep by 10). I think he made ramen noodles.
Food-wise, I'm okay but laundry I hate with a passion, especially here. The last two days were beautiful days--sunny and about 80ish degrees, something that hasn't appeared in Hanoi for weeks. So I decided I would do laundry tomorrow to take advantage of this sun and finally have some really dry clothes instead of the dampness that comes with cloudy cold days. Today was cloudy and dark. It's almost like living in Seattle...
My last story also involves laundry. Lunar New Years Day, I went to shower. Being American, I am weak towards cold water, which is what my family in Saigon has concluded. So when I shower, they heat up water for me in a pot and pour it in a bucket for my use. Okay, no problem, a nice hot "shower" (I use a water scoop) would be nice. Not wanting to be wasteful, I used all of the hot water, down to the last drop. I then grabbed my towel and wiped my face and hair and started to dry my arms. I then look down and see these tiny brown dots all over me--I'm not wearing my glasses and I am that blind. Turns out those dots are ants that decided my towel was play area. So then, naturally, comes the biting and the stings that result from that. My only option--rinse myself off. But, being a non-wasteful person, I used all of my hot water and now had to rinse myself off with cold water, which as anyone who has started in the hot tub and moved to the pool knows, felt much colder than it really was because I was warm from the hot water.
Ant bits on my neck, head, face, shoulders, arms and chest while I was shivering like a wet puppy. It seems I only get insect bites in large quantities over a large portion of my body (see HaLong Bay entry). Luckily, like AZN mosquitoes, these were tiny bites that didn't itch as much--I shudder to think if I was covered by Texas fire ants. Yeah, TEXAS AND AMERICAN ANTS ARE SUPERIOR!
USA
USA
USA
suck it communist ants.
tony
Oh and to ruin your day, the kitty in the pic on my sex post is dead. Got sick and died. This post is dedicated to you. RIP
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Bad things about Vietnam
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| The view from my hotel in HCMC, very similar to my life in Vietnam....so deep (from the lack of depth?) and emo. |
Eh, it has been awhile...sorry. I was busy not caring about this blog and doing other stuff like going outside. And I left my sex post as the last one so maybe I should update at least once more. So I read a report that FB and blogs make people more depressed because, surprise, we tend to lie and exaggerate the current state of our lives--we are in essence performing and creating an online public persona and I believe generally people want to be "cool" (do people still use that word? I want to be up-to-date on my slang) and accepted among their peers. So when other people see what awesome lives everyone is having, they get sad...kind of like when you get to college and you discover it's not like those zits & tits movies. You know, how you don't go to parties every day and they usually end up in throw up or boredom rather than sex and how not only white people go to college or all black people at college don't have to play sports, and that women don't rip off their shirts all the time and, gasp, some of them are smart. Weird world.
So, this blog will discuss what a horrible time I am having in Vietnam, well, at least to the limit that I don't set off red flags and big mean men in gaudy green suits (seriously, you're communist, not color-blind--even Lenin would say "that green is a bit off....") come bursting through the door.
First, I can't breathe at night. My nose literally fills with snot and clogs up. I don't understand. When I blow my nose, mucus comes out but four seconds later, more mucus comes in. I don't know where it comes from or where it was being store that it happens that fast. I take Clartin daily, use a saline solution spray everyday to keep my nose moist, and brought a humidifier but nothing has worked. I have searched for a neti pot/nasal cleaner in Hanoi but they don't seem to have one. I made a make-shift one with a water bottle (see dad, 2 years of Nuclear engineering paid off) but it is not as good as I don't think it provides enough pressure (okay dad, so maybe I should have studied calculus 3 harder...). I also found out that discussing how to clean out your nasal passages is NOT an attractive topic to your significant other. Anyways, I fall asleep with my mouth open, occasionally waking up because my brain is telling me, "please breathe more or you will die," and I end up with a sore throat in the morning.
I folded and brought "Western" medicine, aka Oxymetazolin hydroclorid, which I have read that if you use this more than 3 times a week, you will become addicted, as in your nose will be unable to clear itself without this medicine. I don't think that is a good thing and certainly not a long-term solution (I am a "My body is a temple and I try to limit the adding chemicals to it" type, though I make an exception for gummy bears. But, I am not "I won't vaccinate my children cuz it causes Autism" type, though I did hear vaccines might make you die 80 years after you take them...did I just discover a link Jenny McCarthy?) Slightly positive note is that I have an appointment with an Vietnamese doctor who practices Chinese medicine in a center named after the Japanese Budda of Medicine alongside with a Swedish Acupuncturist--very transnational and we'll see how that goes.
Another non-sexy topic is deworming. No, I do not have worms--at least I don't think so...I do eat on the street a lot...But a precautionary action to do while living in a third world country is to deworm yourself after 5-6 months. So I have been taking 2 pills a day for 3 days of medicine that eliminates any worms in my digestive tract (Yeah, I rather have chemicals than worms in this case). Just in case you were worried about my bowel movements. I know EAG isn't worried about my nasal problems or my bowel movements. An actual quote I said to her via skype: "Well, I got to go clean out my nose and deworm myself." I'm a bit confused but I think she is no longer attracted to me anymore. I don't know where I went wrong; I think that somewhere between "I going to make booger water" and "I'm taking medicine to kill worm parasites in my lower digestive system that may or may not exist," the romance disappeared.
I blame it on the distance. I would not recommend having a relationship with a person who is in a time zone that is 12 hours different from yours because it is getting a bit difficult, as in I just miss her. I think the first couple of months was bearable but now it is just sappy. As I was telling SaB, I spend all day in bed with my head resting on my forehead pining for EAG--so thank you taxpayers for supporting my pining. (Though I shouldn't joke as I hear there are some big cuts coming from the Government. And I should probably stop sending letters to Joe Barton...) I'm not going dwell on this point, considering there are couples who go through tougher hardships (i.e. Soldiers in Afghanistan), but the point is I'm very lonely here sometimes and wish I had someone to
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| Worms... |
She's actually planning to come here in May (sorry, that's good news) and I been trying to plan out some dates around the town. While there are a couple of spots I want to show her and I do love living in Hanoi, I find the food scene here, well, bland and disappointing. For the city that invented Pho, it makes a pretty weak bowl of Pho. Having eaten my fair share of pho, I think I can be a pretty good judge--I can tell you my mommy makes the BESTEST ever bowl of pho, though I think the general rule is that everyone's mommy makes the best bowl of pho, though my mommy's is the best--and while I understand pho is different everywhere (see my post on authentic Vietnamese culture), flavorless broth is flavorless broth. And generally, I find Vietnamese people's taste in cuisine the same; they tend to repeat food choices and never venture outside their culinary bounds. I love Indian food but it is very difficult to convince any friend to actually come with me and try Indian food, which Hanoi has a couple of decent spots. In other types of cuisine, however, Hanoi is severely lacking and I'm not surprised since most Vietnamese people won't go to these places.
Example: I got some people to try Dim Sum from this Chinese/Viet joint. Yet, once we were looking at the menu, they all got scared and ordered all Vietnamese dishes. Overall, Dim Sum are mainly dumplings and generally speaking, Hong Kong/Chinese cuisine is not that revolutionary or different (I can somewhat understand hesitation to try Indian Food) from Vietnamese food--it's pork balls wrapped in wonton wrappers, which they have in Hanoi in soup, so I'm confused on where the fear comes from. (Oh and the dim sum was horrible.) I am not a picky eater, which is probably why I have to deworm (I'm really stretching out this deworming joke), and it frustrates me when people I hang out with limit my food choices--I usually visit places alone like a loser and they usually disappoint in the taste department.
Speaking of taste, my lower-middle class background rears its head every now and then and after watching the Super Bowl commercials, I was craving Doritos. So I went to go get some and when I mean "some," I mean the imported kind which tastes closer to "home"--yes America and Freedom tastes like Doritos Cooler Ranch--and I don't mess around when it comes to Doritos. Turns out, the store closest to my house that has them ran out and I learned a medium sized bag (300 grams-ish) (no they don't have the Super 8 pound bags here, or what Americans call "the small bag") is 78,000 or 4 dollars. Not a big deal but 4 dollars for so little chips and early onset diabetes is a bit steep and the sad thing is I'm still going to buy them and eat them alone on my couch while watching Jersey Shore or Katy Perry on MTV Asia.
Typing Katy Perry's name, who is clearly a Feminist hero, has reminded me of my last point: my feminist attempts in Vietnam. So far, no bueno. I was talking to a female student in January about what she wanted to do after she finished college. "Well I would like to be _________ and I think I would really enjoy doing it, but once I get married, I think I'll quit and stay home." Beep Beep Beep, Feminist Alarm! I responded (very angrily of course!!), "You know, you don't have to quit your job and stay home." I was met with a very, very blank stare. "Hmmm...what do you mean?" Oh boy. "Well, after you get married, you can still work. There is no rule that says you have stay home. If you like your job, you can continue to do it and then there will be more money that can help you and your family." "But what happens if I have kids? Who will take care of the house and kids?" "If you have kids, your husband can help out. [She made the ???? face] Last time I checked, Vietnamese men can wash dishes too. [Confused Laugh?] Maybe you can work part-time [I can't reveal her job but I know it's really flexible] and your husband can stay home sometimes and watch the kids while you go to work. I mean, it's okay to focus on your family, but I think if you enjoy your job, you shouldn't have to quit when you have a family." "But...it's Vietnamese tradition..." Oh, you can't argue with tradition...the converstation goes on but that fall back on Vietnamese Tradition argument is too strong for to break right now but maybe I should keep at it!
Anyways, I have more sad aspects of my life that I will try to keep for later. Oh back to food. Can SOMEBODY in Hanoi please learn how to make hummus? Like good, lemony, tart, not watery hummus. Please!!
Feeling less depressed?
tony
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